Selfish

My poor DH.  Sometimes I really wonder what he was thinking when he proposed to me.  I really do think that he got the short end of the stick.  I'm not intentionally putting myself down (trust me, I've got a pretty big ego) but I've got a very long list of faults and yet he still wants to be with me.  Maybe he's a bit crazy!

One of my biggest flaws is how selfish I am.  Like most couples, my DH and I have loans that we need to pay off before we can consider buying a place of our own.  However, I am obsessed about buying a home where we can settle down.  Yet, we can't do that until we figure out where my DH will be working permanently after his finishing his MBA.  At this point, we don't even have RFO's to our next duty station which we need to move to in April.  So I have to quit my job and find a new one, maybe move to the other side of the country and procure an apartment through the internet.

See how selfish I am?  I am not thinking about how we should probably be saving money for a better future.  I am thinking about how much I want to have children and raise them in a beautifully decorated home where I can entertain friends and live comfortably with my DH.  All I can think about is how awful it will be to move to a new place and leave behind my great job, my friends and family.

My DH is always looking out for our future and planning ahead.  He is trying to create a life where I could stay at home if I wanted (not that I could... seriously, I might go crazy if I don't work), take care of our future children, be a great homemaker, etc...  Me?  Yeah, I'm the wife that hasn't sent her spouse a care package in over three months (including the holidays).

"World's Worst Military Spouse"

at your service...